What Should I Do With My Life? Wait, Don’t Answer That.

Can I get some pumpkin? I’m so happy. It’s Pumpkin Ale season again.

Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching Marie TV, the place to be, to create a business and life that you love. And today is Q & A Tuesday, one of our favorite days of the week. And today’s question comes from Kristen, and she asks.

Hi Marie, I’m Kristen, and I am 11 year old girl who has been watching you for about six months now. And what can I say? You’re funny, you’re hip, you’re sassy, you’re creative, and when you need to be, professional. And I honestly fell in love with you on the first video. So here’s my Q. What do you do when you feel lost about what you like, about who you love, and what you want to be. Bye.

Kristen, this is an incredible question, and I wish I could sit down with you and answer all of your Q’s, because you’re brilliant. You’re so curious and amazing and you’re just 11 years old. Now, the first thing I want to say is that feeling confused or lost about what you like and what you want to be is something that nearly all of us struggle with. You know, another way that people ask this is, “What should I do with my life when I grow up?” You’ll probably be asked this question many, many times. It’s because adults have been asked this question our whole lives and it’s kind of the way that we relate to each other.

Now, here’s my problem with this question, particularly for someone your age. This question puts a lot of pressure on you because you don’t have to make this decision right now. Where you are in your life, it’s all about being creative, and exploring, and learning exactly what you’re doing. And here’s the thing. You’re probably going to change what you want to do for a career many times between now and when you finish your formal education, and even as an adult too.

Now, for everybody else, especially if you’re an adult and you’re still asking yourself, What should I be when I grow up? Hopefully this will help you too. Instead of asking, what should I do? A way more powerful and useful question to ask yourself is, who do I want to be? Meaning, what kind of person do you want to be in this world? What’s the energy that you want to bring to anything that you actually do? So here’s the thing. This is a very different question to ask yourself, and it’ll get you completely different results. After all, you are a human being, not a human doing, and who you are shows up in everything that you do.

So Kristen, I want you to sit down and really ask yourself, who do I want to be in this world? Do I want to be loving, kind, inclusive? Do I want to be playful, engaged, compassionate? Really think through what being qualities are most important to you. Maybe it’ll be being artistic and sharing your art with the world. Maybe it’ll be being helpful and being a leader. Then just ask yourself, how can I take what’s already in my heart, and express this into the world? What can I do right now to express exactly who I am, and who I want to be?

When I’m feeling lost, that’s what I do. I ask myself, well, who do I want to be right now? And the answer that most often pops up is loving and helpful. So then I say, okay, well how can I spread some love right now? How can I be helpful and give to somebody else? And when I ask myself those questions, I often get intuitive flashes about things, like projects I need to take, on or things I need to go do. Or sometimes it’s as simple as picking up the phone, and reaching out to someone and giving them some love.

Now, I got more ideas and resources to share with you, Kristen, and I’ll put the links below. But the big takeaway from today’s episode is this. That, regardless of your age or what you’ll eventually do for a career, I want you to remember that you have the power in each and every moment to consciously choose and express who you want to be.

Now, here’s a tweetable that’ll help you remember. Greatness doesn’t come from what you do, but from who you are. No matter what you do, your real work in this world is to choose who you want to be, and be it.

So Kristen, that was my A to your Q. I really hope it helps and I cannot wait to hear how it goes. Now I would love to hear from you. Who do you want to be in this world, and what’s one simple action that you can take right now to express it? As always, the best discussions happen after the episode, over at marieforleo.com, so go there and leave a comment now.

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Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams, because the world needs that special gift that only you have. Thank you so much for watching, and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.

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Get my hair away from my face. Fantastic. Look, I make a mean tofu scramble, so I’m not afraid of soya, you know what I’m saying? I just don’t like people yelling at me for my choices.