Are The People Around You Dulling Your Drive?

I do great when I don’t worry about my hair. I should wear stripes, pink lipstick and a braid bun a lot more often.

Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching Marie TV, the place to be to create a business and a life that you love. And today’s Q & A Tuesday and today’s question comes from Claudia and she writes, “Hi Marie, I’m 26 years old, Brazilian and German and moved to Germany eight months ago. I left my whole life and family in Brazil to dive into the unknown. I’ve always wanted to start my own online business and have yet to find inspiration. Finding a job in the field I studied wasn’t happening so I got a part time job at a store. My colleagues are amazing, goodhearted people, but they don’t have ambition. I mean, none whatsoever. I miss having smart conversations about life and I miss constant inspiration. I love art and culture, yet I’m not pursuing any of it. I’m in a state of numbness and have no idea why.

Do the people you spend the most time with influence you in a positive or negative way? I’ve always been a doer, but this time I’m having trouble getting back on track. Thanks for all you do. Claudia.” Claudia, this is a very interesting question. Now most of us have heard that famous Jim Rome quote that says “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” And whether or not you agree with that, I think we can all agree that we human beings have influence on one another. So the people you hang out with on a daily basis, the people you work with, the people you talk with, of course they’re going to have an impact on you, whether it’s positive or negative. Now, should you stop talking and hanging out with all those nice people you work with? Of course not.

As you said, they’re amazing good hearted people. But I do want to give you the secret to getting yourself back on track. It’s something I heard from Oprah a few months back when I was at her Life You Want Weekend. So she told this story from when she was a little girl and it’s something that she did that helped her thrive no matter what environment she found herself in. So she memorized the poem Invictus and she put a huge emphasis on these last two lines. “I am the master of my fate. I am the captain of my soul.” Claudia, you’ve got to take responsibility for your behavior and realize that you too are the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. And the captain doesn’t get on the boat and go, “Oh no, where’s this boat going?” The captain steers the boat where the captain wants it to go.

So Claudia, you’ve got to take the wheel of your ship and start steering it somewhere inspiring. Now I know you also said you feel kind of numb and like you’re in a funk. Well, whenever I’m in a funk and I need to get motivated again, you know what I do? I have myself a dance party and I dance it out hard. Does having a dance party sound trite? Maybe. But there’s undeniable power in combining physical movement with awesome music. And once you do your dance party, you got to ask yourself, what’s the next best action I should be taking?

Maybe you’re going to want to go to a museum. Maybe you’re wanting to go see a movie. Maybe you’re going to head out to a bookstore. Doesn’t matter. The point is you need to take immediate action. Next, I want to challenge you to something that you may not have considered. Being the captain also means that you lead your crew, so you’ve got all these amazing people at work. Why not start some inspiring conversations with them? Ask them about their talents, their families, their hopes and dreams. You can actually lead them to start having these incredible conversations with you. Finally, you’ve got to make it your priority to expand your circle of influence.

When I first started, I didn’t really have that many ambitious friends either, and I remember going to Toastmasters. And I got my butt out and I went to business conferences and online marketing conferences to meet other like minded people. Today I’m surrounded by the most creative and ambitious people you could possibly imagine. So bottom line, Claudia, I want you to remember that yes, you are the master of your fate and the captain of your soul. And each and every day you’ve got to take that wheel and make sure that you’re steering your ship in the right direction. That was my A to your Q, Claudia. Let us know how it goes. And now I would love to hear from you. Do you believe that you’re the average of the people that you spend time with? And if your ambition level isn’t where you think it should be, what are three specific action steps that you could take to steer your ship in the direction of your dreams?

As always, the best discussions happen after the episode over at marieforleo.com, so head on over there and leave a comment now. Did you like this video? I really did. If you did, subscribe to our channel and I would be so grateful if you shared this video with your friends. And if you want even more awesome resources to create a business and life that you love plus some personal insights from me that I only talk about in email, come on over to Marieforleo.com and sign up for email updates. Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world really needs that special gift that only you have. Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on Marie TV. B-school is coming up. Want in? For more info and free training, go to joinBschool.com. Oh, you so good. I’m a very visual person. I need to see. Don’t talk to me. Show me. Are trolls real? Are we talking about schnitzel? What’s going on here? The bun makes me sassy. Like I want cowboy boots, beer and something to ride.