Asking for Help Is Hard — Do It Anyway

Marie Forleo:

Hey, it's Marie Forleo and welcome to another episode of the Marie Forleo Podcast and Marie TV, the place to be to create a business and life you love.

So once again, we are doing another unusual episode. Last week, I shared with you all a bit of what has been happening in these past few weeks, this past month, major family health crisis. And the first thing I need to say to you is, thank you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. The emails, the comments, the messages that you've sent my way, the prayers that I know you have sent our way has made such a tremendous difference to me. I have read so many notes and so many emails that have almost… that have brought me to tears. And I just want you to know how much your words and your kindness have meant to myself, to my family.

Energy is a real thing in this world, and it is not a coincidence that once I shared with you all through our MF Insider, that's our email, if you don't get them, you should sign up at marieforleo.com, and the last week's episode of Marie TV and the Marie Forleo Podcast, there was a marked difference in how my folks are doing, specifically my mom. We've had some huge breakthroughs and I know that your love and support made a difference there. So that's the first thing I wanted to share.

The other two things I want to share with you today are lessons that have made a huge difference for me in these past few weeks and I think they may make a difference to you too. The first is about asking for help and the miracles that can come when you are brave enough and courageous enough to ask for help. I know that so many of you who listen to the show, you are ambitious, you are driven, you are fiercely independent, you've been through so much, and you're usually the kind of folks who carry everything on your shoulders, very much like I do. And yes, I know and I believe to my core that everything is figureoutable, but I am very certain that I am not the one that has to figure everything out, nor could I possibly ever figure everything out.

At earlier times in my life, I have found it really hard, quite frankly, to ask other people for help when I need it. I don't want to be a burden. I don't want to seem like I'm incompetent or incapable. I don't want to bother people, I know that they're so busy. But my goodness, the miracles that can come from asking for help are endless. And in this past period, there were so many times when I just found myself, quite frankly, on my knees, not sure which way to turn. I just started texting friends who I felt could be resources or might have insight or might know someone that knows someone. I just started firing off those texts, which again, not comfortable for me, not a usual place that I find myself in, but every single time the information that came back, the resources that came back, the connections that came back, were absolutely, and this is not an understatement, lifesaving.

Asking for help does not mean that you're weak. Asking for help is something that we all need to do. I just want to remind you of that because there are so many points in all of our lives, and it might have to do with a health crisis, it might have to do with something in our personal lives, it might have to do with something in our business, where we find ourselves up against a wall, between a rock and a hard place or just at the end of all of our own resources. And where that figureoutable miracle will come from. Where the breakthrough will come from is the people that you know, but you have to ask for help.

I remember a few years ago, actually, when I was healing from my hysterectomy, my mom was staying with me. And I remember just being in pain and laying on the couch and her and my dad were staying with me in our tiny little apartment in New York City. She was sitting next to me and she says, "Ree." She's like, "Don't you realize?" She's like, "I know you're in pain right now," but she's like, "Are you asking your angels for help? They don't help you unless you ask for it. That's how the deal works." And I remember chuckling to myself when she said that because it's so like my mom to just be like, "You have to ask for it. This is how angels work in the world. They don't just show up. You need to request them in." And I think for our human angels, it is the same thing. We have to ask for their help.

So sometimes that can be a little challenging, I know, when it comes to language. What am I going to say? Am I bothering them? And so here's a little bit of the phrasing that I used, if it could be a good jumping off point for you if you ever find yourself in your own shit pickle, for lack of a better word, or some kind of situation where you really need folks to come in and support you. I shared a little bit about what's happening. "Hey, I'm in the midst of this pretty intense family health crisis. I would just love 10 minutes of your advice or guidance if you have them for me." Asking folks for just a little bit of time for their advice or guidance or perspective, if they might know anything about the topic that you are challenged with, that you're struggling with, that you're up against.

My goodness, the text that came back, "Yes. Oh, I don't know the answer, my brother knows." "Oh, I don't know the answer, but my best friend actually happens to live where near your parents are. She might have a resource." It happened time and time again where angels showed up because I was wise enough to ask. So again, the phraseology, letting people know a little bit about what's going on. "Hey, it's Marie. I don't know what you're up to right now. I'm in the midst of X, Y, and Z. Might you have five minutes to point me in the right direction? Might you have 10 minutes just to give me your perspective? Might you have a few moments to just offer me your guidance on what you might do if you were in my situation?"

And I find that phrasing like that often helps because you're not asking that person to have necessarily the answers, but they can start to go through the file folders of their mind and maybe even just be that grounded person that can help you see things from a new point of view or help you start to ask better questions or point you in a new direction that you wouldn't have gone to by yourself.

Which brings me to the final lesson, it's just really a reminder for all of us. When I think back over the past few weeks and I think back to the people who literally came in and helped save the day, in every sense of that word, they are all people that I met through my business. Every single one of them. People that are some of the top health and medical professionals in the world. People that I've met on stages. People that I've met at business conferences. Again, I don't know them, other than my business, and they wound up helping me help get my families' health back on track. And there's like nothing more important than that.

The reason I'm bringing this up is that our relationships in life are everything. Whether you are looking to build your business, grow your business, you just want to have a richer, fuller life, there's no better place to invest than in your relationships and connections. Keeping those people top of mind and sending those texts and checking in on folks and asking how they are.

Right now, we are actually still in the middle of our B-School summer enrollment time. If you don't know what that's about, just go to marieforleobschool.com, you can see all the details. If you do know what it's about, you know that we have this incredible, never before done opportunity where you can do B-School faster and for less money than ever before. You can just go to joinbschool.com, you'll see all those things. The reason I bring this up is because I'm like, "Oh my gosh. My business network literally has helped me in life-saving situations. If I didn't make all those connections, if I didn't grow this business, I wouldn't have had these connections or resources or angels in my life that have made all the difference.”

And if you're someone who feels like you don't really have a strong network, first of all, I want you to know that you can build one. You can build one at any age. It is probably going to be the biggest asset you could ever build in your life for so many reasons. And if you're looking for a place to start, I could think of no better place. Come join me. Come join us in B-School. I've helped over 80,000 people. We have some of the best humans on the planet. Every single human that really helped me these past couple weeks in terms of providing me with life-saving resources, were people that I know that have been through B-School, that I know through my business. That's just another miracle, in my opinion.

So invest in your relationships. Get out to those experiences. Go to those conferences or those dinner parties or those get-togethers or those things where you have that instinct, that inner inclination that you might meet a friend or a colleague or someone that's like-minded, just cool, open-hearted, giving. And keep those connections throughout your life, even if you don't talk to them every week. Even if you don't even talk to them every month or you see them maybe once a year, those folks in those moments can show up and make the biggest difference when you need it most.

So that's what I got for you this week. Again, a huge thanks from the bottom of my heart. Sometimes when y'all send me notes and you send me comments and you send emails, I'll read them. And it's like, "I don't know if Marie will ever read this." Yes, I read everything. I read everything. And I also want to acknowledge and thank you because so many of you have shared about your own shit pickles that you're going through, your own crises, your own devastating circumstances that you're navigating as well. And I also want to say that I have been holding you and your family in my prayers.

So I'm here for you. I'm going to continue to be here for you. So thank you for sending me all of your love, all of your support. You're getting this right now, hopefully you're watching it while B-School is still open. So if you want to join us for that, radically build your network fast, come join us. Either which way, just thank you for being you. Thank you for sharing this journey together. I'm really happy that we're on the planet at the same time. And until next time, stay on your game and keep going for your big dreams because the world really, really does need that very special gift that only you have. Love you so much and I'll see you next time.