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Button TextEver faced a big life decision and felt unsure about which way to go?
Whether it was leaving a relationship, moving to an unfamiliar place, quitting a safe job or spending a large amount of money — many of us find ourselves facing big life decisions with little or no tools to help us make the best choice.
Sure. You can ask family and friends for their opinion, but often you leave those conversations more confused than when you started.
Plus, I truly believe that at the end of the day — you are your wisest advisor.
You have a natural knowing within you that transcends logic, reason and experience — and most definitely other people’s opinions. The problem is that most of us haven’t been taught how to access or trust our inner wisdom.
If you’ve ever stressed and wondered, “Should I really do this?!?” I think you’re going to love today’s episode of MarieTV. You’ll learn a simple, but genius, test I’ve used throughout my adult life that’s helped me make major life-changing decisions, fast.
The best part is that no matter what the outcome, you feel sure in your bones that you made the best and wisest choice for you.
Because in my experience, whether I succeeded or failed was irrelevant once I was clear that the path I was taking was truly what I wanted. I owned it and knew with 100% certainty that no matter what happened, I made the best decision for me.
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View Transcript
Ooh, it flipped. I flipped my script.
Hey, it's Marie Forleo and you are watching Marie TV, the place to be to create a business and life you love, and this is Q&A Tuesday. Today's question comes from Myriah, and she writes, "Dear wonderful Marie, here's the sitch. I'm in my mid 30s, God help me, how did that happen? And took a huge risk in my mid 20s to pursue what I always wanted, to live in Europe and turn my scientific career into one focused on mainstream media. And then what was wonderful became a nightmare, which included the death of my boss and my work environment became extremely toxic. I left, encouraged by all to take a position back in North America for a prestigious government agency. Looking back, I realized I never wanted this new job, but now I'm here and hating it. I should have listened to my heart and volunteered for Habitat for Humanity in Malaysia instead. I would have had no money but had been so happy."
"If I leave now, the people who hired me have a lot of clout and could make sure I never work in this field again. How can I reconcile my true calling and do what's right for me with possibly destroying some very influential connections? Thanks so much. Warmest, Myriah."
Myriah, this is an awesome question, something all of us can relate to. I mean, we'll all find ourselves at crossroads in our own life, and we can often struggle with: do we take the safe road or do we follow our heart, which can often feel a lot riskier, at least in our minds. Now, there's two important things I want to talk about today with you. The first is about burning bridges, and what I want to tell you is a tweetable.
What's highest and best for you is always what's highest and best for everyone around you. I guarantee that by hating your job, you are not doing your influential connections any favors. In fact, you're probably doing more harm to your reputation than if you left. Telling the truth always wins. Now, as it relates to leaving your job, of course you got to do this in the right way and take full responsibility for what you're about to do. It's one thing to send your boss a text like, "I'm going to Malaysia to build houses. Peace in your crease." It's another to set up a proper meeting and really cocreate a game plan so you're not leaving everybody in a lurch. But the second and more important thing I want to talk about today is a crucial test that'll help you make the right decisions every time, especially when they're huge decisions just like this one.
Myriah, one of the first things you said is, "I'm in my mid 30s, how did that happen?" It happened because it happens. The next thing you know, you're going to be saying, "Oh my God, I'm in my 60s, how did that happen?" You got to realize, as you get older, time goes by faster and faster, and before you know it, you're going to be 80 like that. So here's what you got to do. You got to sit yourself down right now and do the 10-year test. Ask yourself, 10 years from now, will you regret not doing this? Whether it's moving to Malaysia, or changing careers, or starting your own business, really imagine your future self, you 10 years from now, will you regret not following your heart? I'll tell you one thing you will regret, not moisturizing. Trust me, you're welcome. But back to the big things.
I did the 10-year test when I was 25 and trying to figure out if I should pursue dance as a profession. Now you got to realize I was broke, I had hardly any dance training, and sadly 25 is over the hill in the dance world. So I sat myself down and I said, "Marie, when you're 35, will you regret not having gone for this whole hip hop thing?" And in a nanosecond, my answer was, "Hell yes, I'll regret it." In that moment, all wishy washiness went away. I got focused and I kicked some serious dance ass, best decision of my life, and yet another opportunity to show you this. But seriously, for the love of all things holy, trust me when I say, life is short and it's getting shorter by the minute. You must do the thing you're dreaming of and you must do it now.
I believe we all have a direct line to the divine and the call comes through our heart. I'm sorry, I thought I put that thing on vibrate. Oh, voicemail. Hey you guys, can we hear that?
Myriah, you should follow your heart and ditch that poopy job.
Know this, coming from someone who takes a lot of risks, what you can produce in 10 years will absolutely astound you, but you have to start now. And the other thing is, I have never ever, ever met anyone who's regretted following their heart.
That was my A to your Q, Myriah. Hope it helps. Now, I would love to hear from you. Any big decisions on the table? If so, do the 10-year test in the comments below. Tell us, 10 years from now, what will you regret not doing, or creating, or starting, or if you want to do something else, tell us about a time in your life when you made a really big decision and followed your heart.
As always, the very best discussions happen after the episode over at marieforleo.com. So go there and leave a comment now. Did you like this video? I really loved it. If you did, subscribe to our channel and I would be so appreciative if you shared this video with your friends. And if you want even more awesome resources to create a business in life that you love, plus some personal insights from me, that I only talk about in email, get those sweet buns over to marieforleo.com and sign up for email updates. Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special gift that only you have. Thank you so much for watching and I'll catch you next time on Marie TV. B-School is coming up. Want in? For more info and free training, go to joinbschool.com.
Marie, you must give me the number of your hairstylist. You have got it going on. You're looking straight fresh to death. I would definitely hit that. You best be hitting me up when Josh leaves town.
What did she say to me? Yes, Siri, I will hit you up.
Now I’d love to hear from you.
Any big decisions on the table?
Use the 10 year test right now and tell us — what will you regret not doing/creating/going for ten years from now?
Or, tell us your story about a big decision you’ve made where you took a risk and followed your heart. What helped you make that decision and what was the lesson you learned?
Please share with as much detail as you can because your insight may provide a breakthrough for someone else.
Thanks in advance for being brave, kind and insightful in the comments.
You make Tuesday one of my favorite days in the week.
With a ton of love and appreciation,
xoxo