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Mistakes. Loss of judgment. Insensitivity. Diarrhea mouth.
We’ve all been there.
We’ve all screwed up and consequently hurt someone we care about.
This can be really challenging to navigate – and a sticky situation that can filter into every part of your relationship.
Of course, an authentic apology can go a long way towards making things right.
But unless we get this simple act of saying “I’m sorry” just right, we’re likely to add insult to injury.
In this video, you’ll learn how to apologize using a simple two-letter word that can destroy your chances to repair your relationship when things go wrong and how to avoid it.
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View Transcript
Well, hello! It's Marie here and we're going to do one of my favorite segments and it's called Spiritual Stuff! We're going to talk about something that's actually really serious and really important and can totally help you in your life.
So if you've ever been in a position where you make a mistake. You do something that's not so nice whether it's to your boyfriend or your husband, or your girlfriend or maybe it's to a co-worker. Right, maybe you screwed up at work and you need to say, "I'm sorry." Most of us do it in a totally stupid way and so I want to talk right now about the art of doing an awesome apology and it'll just help you so much! It'll help you in your personal life and your business life. You're going to love it!
Okay, so step one, you have to apologize like you really mean it. So no fakey, fake apologies. No eye-rolling. You know when you do that, right? When you're just apologizing to get it over with and you just want them to forgive you. Can't do any fakey fakes, has to be a genuine apology. And did you know this, there's a two-letter word that can ruin any apology? What is it?
Ax? No. Oy! No. ...NO?? And, no it's not no.
You know what it is? It's IF. "I'm sorry IF I offended you. I'm sorry IF I hurt your feelings. I'm sorry IF you think I screwed up." That's total bullsh*t. (Toy: "That was bullsh*t.)
Just apologize. Say, "I'm sorry I offended you. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. I'm sorry I made this mistake." It's really this miraculous little ship that happens because when you say "if," you take all the responsibility away from you and you actually put it on the other person which makes them feel like crap.
So remove the word "if" from your apologies and it's going to be awesome! So step two, and this is a very, very important step. Ask what you can do to make it right. Once you do this beautiful apology, you also want to see if there's anything that you can do to make them feel better.
To build that connection back up and to get you guys back in a relationship. One of the things that you want to remember, you can't rush this. Sometimes if you've hurt someone's feelings, you've offended them, or you've really screwed up big time.
They may be POed for a little while and you can't rush the process You can't go, "Oh my God but I apologized and I didn't use the word "if." Why are they still pissed at me?" Sometimes you just have to give them a little time and space to just get back into the game. But if you really ask them genuinely, what can I do to make it right. Let them give you a response and then go for it.
You're going to be golden. I want you to give this a try and then let me know how it goes. It works like a charm every time and it will keep you in great relationships with the people that you love. So that was your spiritual stuff for this week. I hope you enjoyed it. Like it if you like it! Leave me a comment and of course, share. And as always, come to marieforleo.com, get on the newsletter list so we can be even more connected. Thanks a ton for watching and I'll see you next time!
