Last week was the first time I’ve ever left a yoga workshop, in my life.
Let’s be clear – the teachers were fantastic.
But after my fourth downward dog, I started breaking into a cold sweat, got nauseous and my head felt like it was about to explode.
“Oh great,” I thought.
“Not only do I have to walk out of this yoga workshop, but we’re right at the end of my b-school launch and about to open RHH Live! I can’t get a 24 hour stomach bug now! There’s too much good stuff going on!”
Well, that 24-hour stomach bug turned into a week of being completely out of commission.
And I do I mean completely. For the past six days, I’ve been a hot, sick mess.
Skull crushing headaches. Stomach pain so severe it had me doubled over for 70% of the day. And whatever tiny amounts of food I managed to get down came out faster than a rocket ship.
Not cute.
After the first 3 days with no signs of improvement, I started to get concerned.
I’m “strong like bull” and rarely, if ever, get sick. When I do, it’s pretty minor stuff and I’m back in action within a day or so.
In the moments between bathroom runs, I scoured the web looking for what could possibly be wrong with me.
“Is it salmonella? Hmmm…there was just that big egg recall. Some kind of nastyass 10 foot long parasite or tapeworm? Maybe, but highly unlikely. A life-threatening stomach disease? Boy, would that suck.”
It’s important to note that during the first half of my sick week, Josh was in LA shooting an NBC show so I was flying solo in the Hamptons.
Thank God, I had a crew of awesome girlfriends staying in a house not far down the road to help keep an eye on me.
“You’re pregnant!” was the first thought they all had.
No shot it hell. I didn’t need to pee on a stick to know that wasn’t it.
Then my friend Kate, who knows me well, made a very astute observation. “I think you’re having an upper limit problem Marie.”
Interesting . . .
Cut to day four. I’m pale and emaciated.
Josh is back from LA and it’s clear whatever I had was not going away on it’s own. We headed straight to the doctor so he could run tests.
Later that same evening, I wanted to get out of the house so we stopped by the girls’ house for tea. One by one, everyone took bets on what was causing my mystery illness.
Then Rachel, Kate’s uber intuitive cousin said,
“Marie, I really think those test results will come back negative. It’s definitely an upper limit problem. You’re going through some major growth right now and I’ll bet this is just part of you busting through your upper limits and increasing your capacity for success.”
Kate giggled and nodded in agreement.
Josh smiled, gently squeezed my hand and said “Yeah, that and you really need a break. You’ve been going non-stop. Since you weren’t about to take one willingly, your body decided for you.”
(Damn him for always being right 
)
So in case you’ve never heard of an “upper limit problem”, what Kate and Rachel are referring to comes from Gay Hendrick’s incredible book called The Big Leap.
Here’s the basic idea.
Each of has an internal thermometer for how much success, wealth, happiness, love, and intimacy we’ll let ourselves experience. That’s our upper limit setting. Kind of like our success comfort zone.
When we exceed our internal thermostat setting and life gets super duper OMG good (we have an influx of money, get healthy and thin, find a great relationship) – we unconsciously do things to sabotage ourselves, so we can drop back to the old, familiar place where we feel in control.
Upper limit problems can manifest like this.
You’ve just had a huge win and then you… get in an accident, break a limb, fry your computer, over-drink, over-eat, over-spend, start a fight with your significant other, get really sick, etc.
You know, fun self-sabotaging stuff like that.
The truth is I was so ridonkulously excited about the success of b-school AND the miracles aligning for my RHH Live event this fall (partnering with Donna Karan’s Urban Zen; securing all of my dream speakers…more on that soon 
)
That I didn’t just bump into my upper limit…I demolished that sucker with a sledge hammer.
So, yeah. I guess I was bound to have a little re-adjustment time.
Cut to Sunday morning. I’m reading Breaking Dawn in bed when the phone rings.
Test results time.
“Hi Marie. It’s Dr. Mott. We got the results back from the lab – really good news. There’s nothing wrong with you. No bacteria, no parasites or anything we need to worry about. You got a regular old stomach virus. Keep doing what you’re doing and you’ll be just fine.”
SUU-WEET!
The girls and Josh, were right on. Upper limit problems – I can handle that. Alien-like intestinal parasites eating their way through my stomach . . . not so much.
So here’s what I did:
I gave myself total permission to chillax. Zero computer time. I told everyone in my world not to expect anything work related from me for a few days.
I rescheduled appointments. Released myself from guilt and totally indulged in healing, coziness and every guilty pleasure I could think of.
I emotionally and energetically celebrated by giving myself permission to relish in a series of non-productive, silly and frivolous things.
(Translation: a whole bunch of Edward, Bella and Jacob plus back-to-back episodes of Mad Men.)
Funny enough, the moment I stopped beating myself up for being sick, my body kicked into speed recovery mode.
Wild how that happens, right?
How To Dismantle Your Upper Limit Problem
Unless you understand this whole upper limit thing, you may mistakenly believe that you’re flawed or simply not “good enough” to handle a big jump in your success or happiness.
It may feel like you’re always on the verge of a life altering breakthrough, but you either can’t seem to ever get there or maintain it.
I can tell you first hand that everyone on the planet has varying degrees of “upper limit problems.” Thankfully, they’re a snap to overcome if you’ve got the right tools and an open, willing heart.
Step 1. Get that dealing with “upper limit problems” are a necessary part of the journey.
Look. No one escapes this shit. So don’t feel weak, bad or alone if any of this sounds familiar.
Thankfully, upper limit problems can be super easy to dissolve when you bring compassion and self-awareness to the table.
Which of course means checking both your ego, and your victimy “Why does this always happen to me?” BS at the door.
Important note: Moving through upper limit problems is not a one time event. If you’re committed to continually expanding your levels of wealth, love and happiness, strap in for the ride, baby.
Step 2. Increase your tolerance for how good you’re wiling to have your life be, starting right now.
What’s does this mean? For starters, it means treating exactly where you are and what you have with all the love, honor and respect you can muster. And this isn’t just a mental exercise, you need to act on it.
Tell your your family that you love and appreciate them; be truly grateful for whatever money you have in your bank account; take care of your physical environment and the roof over your head; thank your clients for their business, and nourish your body and soul in every way you can possibly imagine.
Step 3. Go on high ULP (upper limit problem) alert when loads of good stuff starts to come your way.
Pay special attention to your thoughts, behaviors and actions when things in your business and life start getting OMG good. Here’s a question to regularly ask yourself, “How much wealth, love and happiness am I r-e-a-l-l-y willing to have?”
If “A shit bunch!” is close to your answer, then make sure your behaviors and words line up with that answer.
Then keep a watchful, observant eye and open heart.
If you catch yourself about to start an argument, go into some manufactured mental drama or make a royally stupid and rash business decision – stop. Take a few deep breaths. Call your most grounded friend and have a chat.
Remember, any time you’re in the midst of busting through your own upper limits, it’s bound to be a little scary and uncomfortable. You may want to pull back and contract.
Don’t. Hang with the discomfort. It’s a good sign.
It means you’ve just increased your capacity to experience wealth, happiness and love – both for yourself and for us all.
Go thoughts on this one? Ever have an upper limit problem yourself? A story about how you’ve overcome it?
I’d love to hear your thoughts so leave a comment below.
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{ 126 comments… read them below or add one }
Sweet Fancy Moses!! This is EXACTLY what I have been going through this week. A hugey mchuge possibility on the horizon and I am deep in the throes of insomnia and somehow the super negative people in my universe are finding me. Thank you as always for the instant clarity and radical insight. I am going to hang in there and ride this thing out, reinvigorated with the knowledge that I’m not losing my mind but I am shattering a ceiling.
I love love love this post. Thank you for sharing. This happens to me every time I decide to make a leap in business. But I’ve never had a full week of that kind of misery, so you’ve just showed me that I’m not playing big enough.
Okay, BIG upper limit problems, here I come!
ABSOLUTELY agree… something internally always seems to put the brakes on things when they go a LEEEETLE too well. I think this may have also been looked at by T Marv Eker, but I like your post better hun!
Sorry to hear you felt like shit, Glad you’re feeling better, and glad you’re kicking that limit’s ass! I’m due for one of these soon, too. (Inspired in part by you and Laura. I’ll tell you more later.)
Marie – wow, this could not have been better timing! lol. I’ve been going through exactly this this week. I JUST started reading The Big Leap for the first time over the weekend, and have been digging into some other really life-changing stuff as well. Then a whole bunch of depression, irritation and other mental shit popped up and had me feeling like utter CRAP. I have at least been able to recognize it for what it is, though, and am ready to push through and come out the other side into my Zone of Genius!
Thanks so much for sharing your story. It’s really encouraging and inspiring to know that you are dealing with this stuff too!
.-= Jess Webb´s last blog ..Sustainability for Digital Entrepreneurs =-.
Marie-
This is your BEST story so far. Self-sabotage is the story of the ages, especially for us women who think that we should be barefoot in the kitchen and if we strive for anything BIG, then God help us all.
Recently, I’ve had some BIG things happen, and whenever it good fortune, paired with hard work, comes my way, just like clock work, I start with the self-doubt, the “it’s-so-much-bigger-than-me” chatter, the I-don’t-deserve-this-live-cuz-there’s-starving-children-in-Africa syndrome, plus a lot more blah, blah, blah.
What I’ve discovered though is that it’s just Lizzy talkin’, my poor lizard brain who protected my ancestors during the cave man days when volcanoes and bears were threatening their survival. Now, instead of starvation, she’s afraid that someone may judge her, that she might disappoint people, and God forbid, she might make a mistake. Whatever!!!!!
I love what you are doing. And if you begin to experience any of those lizard tunes, know that you have a group of fired up women cheering you on. You are busting through the limits, and as a woman who desires to change the world as well, I’m right there behind you, scared and having a damn good time.
I’ll see you in New York. I’m sure Lizzy is coming too, although I hope I don’t have to pay for her ticket.
I hope you are feeling better.
xo,
t
Thank you Marie! I’ve been watching this happen over and over again – very much looking forward to busting through my self-imposed limitations! I just found you last week and had 2 days to sign up for B-School – I did it! Look forward to the process!
Thank you for this. Now I know why I have been suffering with anxiety these past few weeks (I already suspected). I’m working on growing my life coaching business – really pushing my comfort zones. But I won’t let it stop me.
This is a great article. I have tweeted it.
Yep, I totally get that (and glad you are feeling better, Marie!).
I got sick w/ a horrid sinus infection (have not had one for 15+ years) after G got out of the hospital. And yes, part of that was my self care went completely out the window when she was diagnosed … but also it was this strange thing that my life is amazing right now, with all kinds of amazing new things/people happening, and with her being sick I’ve never taken that readjustment time. It was *so hard* to not work 80 hours a week for the last month … but I had to. And just in the last week, I’ve been feeling kickass again. Yay!
~ ElizabethPW
.-= Elizabeth Potts Weinstein´s last blog ..Review- Flip Mino HD vs Kodak Zi8 vs iMac webcam =-.
Sorry to hear you felt like shit, Glad you’re feeling better, and glad you’re kicking that limit’s ass! I’m due for one of these soon, too. (Inspired in part by you and Laura. I’ll tell you more later.)
.-= Johnny B. Truant´s last blog ..My So-Called Rock Star Life =-.
I felt so strongly about the above comment that I apparently made it twice.
.-= Johnny B. Truant´s last blog ..My So-Called Rock Star Life =-.
Wonderful and timely post. I’m working on a new project and WTF? my face broke out. I had read the Big Leap and I had also attended RHH (LOL) so I recognized the signs. I’m scared about doing this new thing. I’m scared that it will fail and not take me to the next step in my business.
I felt the nerves, relaxed and finished the damn thing!
BTW, I’ve got RHH 2010 marked on my calendar.
.-= Yvonne Bynoe´s last blog ..Creative Entrepreneurs—Market to Your Tribe =-.
Damn girl, that’s an extreme example of the upper limit problem in action and I’m so glad you are feeling better and back with us. This launch has just been absolutely inspirational to watch and I’m sending you so much love and health. I love you girl.
.-= Alexis Martin Neely´s last blog ..Ending a Relationship With Love- Honor and Respect =-.
This is powerful stuff–I think I do this to myself–as soon as I say that, the first thought that comes to mind is negative. “no, no, you just aren’t lucky you’re not sabotaging yourself!” talk about getting deep into the negative. So, here I am, ready to self publish my book and I know it will sell. I won’t let anything keep it from being beyond successful. THANKS!
.-= kathie´s last blog ..Know the Quote Win Georgia’s Kitchen! =-.
Marie, are you psychic? Seriously, this is EXACTLY the thing I needed to hear right now. Thank you!
xoxo
Kirin
Hey Marie,
Growth can be messy and icky, can’t it? I’ve experienced the stomach crap during intense classes when I’ve cleared garbage out of my energy field and everything shifted. I had to drive an hour to get home once before I could toss my lunch. Not fun.
But upper-limit stuff can be more subtle. I’ve been doing it lately — sleeping in. It’s pure scared avoidance just when things are really starting to come together in a new, bigger way.
Thanks for sharing and the reality check. Although I’m disappointed to learn you’re not SuperWoman.
.-= Marsha Stopa´s last blog ..Warning- Skipping breakfast consumes you =-.
Hey Marie…I know exactly what you’re talking about and I’m going through that RIGHT NOW. Actually, as we speak, I was just mulling over whether or not I should go for a run because “I really should get back into my workout routine,” while at the same time still feeling beaten down by this cold I’ve had for a FEW WEEKS (can you believe it???). I’ve been fighting the sickness the whole time, thinking the “strong” thing to do is power through it and go do what I would normally do, but it’s not getting better.
I think some self-care is in order. Perhaps some MadMen as well.
I think sickness is rarely just germs or bugs. For me, anyway, it’s always about something else. And when I get sick, which isn’t often, I do a mental inventory about what’s going on with me.
So perhaps, today ( and for however long it takes), I will take it easy. And really kick this thing.
Thanks for the great post.
Love it. I just helped a client with this same self sabotage mind trick this week and I’m watching out for it myself.
Best post of my day…we were JUST talking about this with a few girlfriends. Self-sabatoge. Because I JUST did it to myself. Why, why, why?
Thank you for sharing all of this. I enjoy reading your posts because they are soooo real and down to earth. And your comfortable with a few irreverent curse words which I love. You have a lot of great things coming your way. I am working on these things for me as my 1st child left for the Big Apple. You have inspired me…and it appears many. Always, Tamsen
.-= tamsen browne reed´s last blog ..speakology- BE SOCIAL- RT @eventsforgood- Today is National Duck Out 4 A Drink Day Observed http-bitly-cJ7Dd7 Who wants to celebrate with me ME =-.
Wow. That was enlightening. I totally get that and am thinking I really need to read the book. Thanks for this. BTW, although I will not be enrolling in the RHHb-school, (only because I am maxing out my brain with so many other programs right now) Thanks, your launch videos gave me some really great inspiration. Really great and I appreciate it.
Lord o’ mighty!!! This makes sooooo much sense!! Thank you so much for that post and I’m glad you’re feeling better!!
Big Smooches!!!!!
Laz
I just wanted to say how much I connected to the sentence: lots of Bella, Edward and Jacob time
I always resort to that when not feeling my best!!!! Girls girls girls!
Wow! I never heard of the upper-limit but what I do know is that when this happens many people take it as a sign that they didn’t deserve that great success/experience or whatever it is. They would say see I got sick so maybe that’s a sign from God it wasn’t meant to be. When in reality it’s self-sabotage. Thanks for sharing this and glad you’re feeling better
.-= Kimmoy´s last blog ..Opening a Boutique- What do my customers want =-.
Love this post! I’ve done this so many times. Your post helped me look at it a little differently and (hopefully!) recognize it before it gets out of hand next time. Staring it in the face and working through it is ALWAYS the answer.
Thanks so much for sharing this!
I am the queen of self sabotage. Luckily I feel that we can teach the lessons we learn over and over so I am grateful to be able to work with women on this stuff.
With children every time they are going through a developmental, huge shift, they get sick, a fever, something. 2 days later they are reading or writing or talking or running. It’s amazing stuff this body of ours.
Glad you are feeling better, this is a big thing to share with people, BIG.
.-= Hannah’s Harvest´s last blog ..Giveaway Winner and Inspiration For The Day =-.
This is amazing, this is EXACTLY what I think my husband is going through. He’s been sick for like 6 weeks straight. He’s got A LOT of stuff going on. He swears he has some kind of flu but I’ve been telling him forever that it’s his mind taking over his body, not any germs. Forwarding this to him pronto!
Love this! I think this happened to me a few weeks ago – I wasn’t physically sick but turned into a cranky psycho mess for a week straight, right as some exciting changes are taking place. Thanks for posting, I will definitely keep this in mind next time I feel a freak out! Hope you are feeling better.
Thanks Marie. Was just telling clients about how I get dizzy when overdoing it. Sure enough flying to guest present each weekend across the US and Mexico this month, you can imagine what my vertigo is like! Nice to know about the Upper Limit Problem and give this “syndrome” a name! Maybe it should be mentioned in Pilates for Buff Bones too
Rebekah
My favorite time this happened to me was when I was on the way to a major, risky, scary, awesome event and someone on the A train PULLED THE EMERGENCY BRAKE.
Which of course means you are stuck there for 45 minutes to an hour while the cops are called or something, there is a whole procedure.
I was late. It was embarrassing. But the amazing woman I was going there to help out pointed out the heavy-handed metaphor–emergency brake!–from the universe and ever since I’ve learned to expect it.
Also, I have learned to warn students who come to my most intense/transformative day-long classes to take the next day off if possible. Over the years it’s become clear that a lot of transformation has a really high correlation with getting the flu the next day!
.-= Elizabeth Merrick´s last blog ..3 Mojo-Zapper for Women- Expecting Yourself to Focus =-.
What an awesome post! Absolutely – been there/done that (& will again). Amazing what we throw our way to keep us from extending beyond our perceived limits & comfort zones. BTW: Can’t wait for November!
Perfect read for me today. I have a big upper limit problem. But awareness is the first step towards mastery and growth. This makes my tweet list today! Thanks for putting this out there!
The timing of this post could not have been any better because I am going through the same thing now. I just launched my new business site and am experiencing all that you mentioned. It is a wonderful feeling to break that upper limit, baby!
Honestly Marie, I got chills reading this, as I am going through this EXACT thing right now. I have been blessed with an influx of good fortune recently (and by recently, I mean in the past couple of weeks) and I am full-on freak out mode. Feeling mentally scattered, physically unwell, weepy, afraid — and meanwhile my life just got so much better! I just ordered Gay Hendrick’s book, and already feel an edge of relief to know there’s a word for feeling miserable when you get what you’ve always wanted. Thanks you so much for sharing this, and feel well.
So glad you’re on the mend!
I’m always amazed at how our bodies eventually find a way to tell us somatically what our intuition already knows, but our conscious minds scramble to persistently overlook.
And, btw, loved LOVED seeing you and LKR blow our your launch. : )
.-= Jonathan “Not the Cookie Lady’s Son” Fields´s last blog ..7 Corporate Sales Persuasion Triggers =-.
I kind of like the reverse perspective of this too. If you’re rarely feeling uncomfortable, a bit anxious, queasy… then you might not be pushing your upper limit enough! I stay on alert for feelings of blah and when they hit I recalibrate what I’m doing and amp it up!
Oh, I SO understand this. I often think that my Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is my body’s way of getting me to slow the hell down! Left to my own devices I’d burn the candle at both ends AND in the middle. There’s probably something medical going on too (recent medical research suggests that ME/CFS may be a form of retrovirus) but I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I got an illness that would FORCE me to put the brakes on and practice self-care.
Also, this reminds me of what I refer to as ‘the post-exhibition Blues’. After I’ve done a big project, finished a big piece of artwork or done an exhibition, I always have a couple of days of feeling slightly miserable, listless and extremely unmotivated. I’ve learnt to just schedule a few days of downtime, particularly after shows.
.-= Kirsty Hall´s last blog ..Name my product! =-.
Getting the book! Thank you so much for sharing this was REALLY powerful and so helpful
Glad you are feeling better!
LOVE this post Marie!
I think we all go through this self-sabotage stuff all the time, without recognizing it for what it is. Instead, if you’re like me, you’ll beat yourself up over it. When I took the big leap of starting my own business, these episodes came on frequently, and I would get so mad at myself. How can you be feeling like this when you are doing exactly what you want? And now you’ve moped all day and wasted precious time. Guilt. Anger. Frustration.
But recently, I have come to understand the root of what is going on, and I am learning to recognize, accept and love myself anyways, just as you have written about. Thank you for sharing
Much love,
Martina
LOVE this article, Marcia – read the book and was literally just having a conversation about Upper Limit Problems with my girlfriend the other night. I’m totally hitting that ULP – what a ride! Thanks for this and hope you’re feeling better!
Wow – I always knew you could stress yourself into sickness, but had never heard of the “upper limit problem.” What’s funny is, as a theatre actor, I usually get sick right after opening weekend. Minor stuff, like sinus infections, but it is still NO FUN. Maybe I need to raise my “setting” to fully expect and allow myself to kick ass in that role. I’ll try it out!
Thanks Marie. I was in the room when Dr. Northrup told us to celebrate when your life feels like it’s falling apart. What a moment! It Alla go back to trusting the Universe has always git your back
Glad you got your much needed rest and that your back in my inbox. I have definitely done some expanding myself over the past 5 days and even though I felt like someone was hell bent on taring me in two, I thankfully am feeling whole again.
With love,
Alma
WOOOOWAH!!!
f&^$*-ing awesome! this so is exactly what I need to hear right now. I completely relate. The body needs to cleanse the old self, to make room for the new.
Thank you for your bright light and commitment to TRUTH and full-self expression.
Hi Marie,
I am going through the same thing. Mine has been for a few weeks though. I have had some really cool opportunities come up and this month and I finally hit my monthly money goal. Yay
Then why do I feel so icky? It started on my birthday when i woke up and my body decided for me, to do a huge detox. I was in the bathroom for a few hours. My stomach didn’t hurt, no nausea, nothing. Then the following week I woke up in a dead sleep with the nausea. I paced outside for about an hour trying to calm the urge to get sick. On top of that I had a huge blowout with my family and the negative people in my life.
With all that has been going on I haven’t gotten excited at all the cool things that are here and the other cool blessing that are on the way. I completely self sabotaged myself.
Now its time to pick myself up, dust myself off, and move into the blessings.
I am so glad that I am not alone in this (which I though I was).
Thank you so much for this post.
xoxo
What a powerful lesson this must have been for you. I think it speaks volumes that you’ve surrounded yourself with people that could identify what you’re going through… for exactly what it is. You are a rock star Marie!
When does registration open up for the RHHLive event? I’d love more details so I work on my plan to be there.
xo & belief in you,
Carmen
I love this. I have never heard of an “upper limit problem” but I certainly get the concept when you describe it and I know I’ve bumped into it many times. Now I’m more aware and can make better decisions around how to deal with my own mindset.
Thanks so much for sharing this great, totally relevant, and sobering story.
Love this Marie
You are spot on and explain the whole concept exceptionally. Looking forward to seeing you soon. Thanks for the post, and so glad you are feeling better!
Oh Marie…I have been self-sabotaging myself in the ONE area that I ABSOLUTELY LOVE – my new career! Crazy right? I can’t explain it and it made no sense to me….until now. Am I afraid that I could be one of the greatest pyschotherapist alive? that I can actually help people? that I can quit this job and be ok and really focus my time on what “I” want? oh dear…I can’t sleep on this anymore or think about this anymore (“this” is my doubts) – thank you Marie….
Well, I’ll be damned ! Been treading water in RHH and getting swept up in the current pushing me on to do things I never thought I would or could. Signed up for B-School, too, because I WANT MORE. Great things have been showing up for me – almost miraculously. It’s almost TOO much.
So of course:
Broke up a chihuahua fight last night, (I know..), am now sporting Sponge Bob bandaids, then racing around for some alcohol very conveniently broke my toe. This puts a crimp in my dance breaks, I can tell you.
Still I’ll take the broken toe over the barfing stuff. Glad you are better. And thanks to you I can see this for what it is.
Marie – This article is so incredibly enlightening! It sheds so much light on some of the issues I’ve been dealing with in my life right now. Thanks so much for the clarification. I’m gonna make it through the fog!
-Kadence
Thank you so much for sharing this story so candidly. One of the most glorious parts of being a member of the better-us movement is getting a front row view into others’ experiences so we can once again have a holy shit moment of “me too!”. We can never be reminded enough to take some time to pay attention to ourselves and our limits – both upper and lower – to know that in the in-between spaces, we’re offering ourselves at the least a little sumpin’ sumpin’ to make sure we’re essentially getting what we need. And sometimes… it can literally be nothing.
Hello Marie,
I am a new subscriber to your site and to your work in general. I thought this post was fun to read and informative to read. Me? well, I have just left a less than perfect live, to go to another country to start creating a more perfect one that actually involves having some of the goodies that you promote as being possible for anyone to achieve. Now, not only have the gremlins come with me, but they seem to have gotten stronger so, here’s what I am proposing……that I read and re-read this article until it sinks in to my gremlin leaking brain.
No time like the present, so I’m off to get myself back on track and keep myself heading towards the life that somehere deep down I know is mine for the taking.
Thanks for sharing this Marie! I hope you are feeling much better by now.
Oh, and I am not sure where I;ll be when your seminar is on, but if I am anywhere near NYC, I’ll definitely be there.
Just experienced an upper limit issue earlier this year when for two months in a row I made a lot more money than I ever thought possible–and having a darned fine time doing it. Then after the second month of doubling my income, I subconsciously put on the brakes. A couple of weeks later, Synchronicity, my wise old friend, lead me to Christiane Northrup’s radio show whose guest speaker just happened to be none other than the fabulous Gay Hendricks, who of course spoke to this issue. Since that show, I’ve been in the process of demolishing the upper limit block ever since. Example–taking the Rich, Hot and B-school online course in September. Yay me!
Marie,
Damn girl! I went through this strange “sickness” last year. The difference is I gave into the sabotage & I’m just now figuring it out. Thanks, this really helped me…looking forward to B-School.
Cheers,
Kim
My acting coach called this effect “self-defeating.” Pretty much what you describe as your upper limit problem. It should be simple to manifest an infinite upper limit, so that you never experience what you just went through again.
.-= Matches Malone´s last blog ..3 Takeaways from this years 168 Film Festival =-.
We’ve been having a mirrored bi-coastal experience, Marie.
Fortunately the he-man turned into Florence Nightingale for me… Yes, the 5 Love Dynamics went on-hold while I recovered. Now I can go past the upper-limit and roll out http://5LoveDynamics in a few weeks.
Thanks for this behind the scenes post.
Sherrie Rose
The Love Linguist
Touched and honored that you shared this side of yourself, when society expects us to be perfect all the time. Never would have imagined reading this story from you! But that’s what’s gotten me so crazy excited about RHH B-school. It resonates deeply with true experiences, not some bullshit fantasy that doesn’t exist. It’s a part of success that’s not talked about, but needs to be.
OMG, I’m having an upper limit problem!!
Now I’m relieved…
Seriously, things were going so well, my 13month old daughter suddenly changed from seperation anxiety to being a little monkey, I got married, I’m having a blast writing articles for my blog, I got great photos done, my blog attracts more and more regular readers and people love what I’m writing, I just started my own business, b-school came right in time and I actually have the money to pay it effortlessly, I get more things done than ever and I’m having a great time and during all this amazing time, I lost 16 pounds!
And now my mind starts thinking ridiculous thoughts that cause anxiety, I started over-eating again and I seem to want to pull back to my older me…
Well, if I’m just having an upper limit problem, I can live with that!
Thanks Marie!
Hannah
.-= Hannah´s last blog ..Let’s talk about poop =-.
I SO had this happen last year – was planning some big things for my biz, had just signed on to work with my coach and BAM… I got sick as a dog with strep throat. Like flat on my back, couldn’t talk, could barely move sick for a full week. (and I hadn’t had strep throat in like 20 years.) I didn’t really know what was going on at the time, but I did figure it was some kind of reset/stretch based on taking thing up a level. And my coach shared with me later on that “all his clients get really sick when they sign up to work with him”, LOL
Makes me think then that we need to be looking for these “upper limit” moments – otherwise we aren’t playing a big enough game… ? hmmmm.
Awesome! I totally am in it right now. Going to take a stand for my work in the world and feel good but my body is giving me a hellava time. Totally will check out the book and know that when you want to go bigger something’s gotta give. There must be a law for that – oh yeah, Upper Limit let’s say EXPANSION!
Glad you better Marie and so psyched to be coming to NYC!
.-= Hillary´s last blog ..Hello world! =-.
Great reminder, tell my clients something along the same lines all the time, but, ya know, don’t practice what I preach 100% of the times. Thanks again for everything!
Hi Marie, so happy you’re not feeling icky anymore. The last time I had an upper limit prob (which I just recognized thanks to you), I totalled my car. Luckily, no one was injured and the insurance company was amazing. I decided to go carless — in LA! Intererestly, I think the decision not to buy a car helped me break through to the next level.
I’m new to your site and work, having gotten your B-school launch videos somewhere else. Though fascinated, I decided that B-school wasn’t a match for me…I wasn’t feeling a connection. This post was so heartfelt, wise and enlightening, it has changed my whole view. Thanks!
Hahaha. I love it! My upper limit is tech related: phones out, internet down, and a flat tire on my car so I can’t even drive to a wifi cafe. (until a friend reminded me I have a spare tire… duh). I’ll stick with the silent retreat a few days, and then get it all fixed in time to amp up my biz and income to where it belongs! Thanks for the article, Marie.
Upper Limit Problem, indeed. I notice this happening in lots of places in my life. When friends start to get too close, I’ll push them away. When my weight drops or my size gets smaller, I find myself drawn magnetically toward gluten free cupcakes and chocolate sugar treats. When I’m crafting a new program for my business, my mind chatters away…who will ever pay THAT for this program? who do you think you are to offer these services? everyone will laugh at you…better quit before you start and save yourself the embarrassment.
I learned through sports that everything my mind tells me is a lie (my body, on the other hand, always knows the truth). I simply tell it, “That’s nice, I appreciate that you’re concerned for me. Let’s chat later when I am not otherwise occupied.”
But of course, it’s a work in progress. I still get caught in the mind trap, more often than I would like.
.-= Sukie´s last blog ..How to tap your body’s inner wisdom for health and healing =-.
AMAZING article Marie!
Want I think really freaking’ rocks as you were upping your upper limits (so brilliant) from my view your biz has been running like a bad ass machine
not once did I notice you were a hot mess rather…. I want in on B school!
Congratulations to Marie on your amazing-ness!
XO Karen
.-= Karen Fagan´s last blog ..Afraid to Speak Your Truth =-.
This blog-post came at just the right time, so thank you for this gift. Here’s my question: How do our upper limits form? And when?
Thanks!
Mel
Hi Marie,
I saw you speak for the first time at Christian Carter’s fantastic seminar a few years ago. I even won a yoga CD from you! I continue to read your e-mails, and was really tempted by your seminar(especially since Donna Karan is involved…I’m in the fashion business!
But, what stopped me in my tracks is your mention of the “upper limits” syndrome. I am going thru that very thing….and have managed to break thru one barriar, but having a problem with the REALLY BIG opportunity. Now I know why!
I am a perfect canidate for more info…..keep on your great path, and I will try and get on track to attend your seminar!
Thanks,
Debra
PS Love your taste in movie/books;) just starting Breaking Dawn myself!!!
Yo M,
Concerning your story and findings: Yup.
JR
Never happent.
I tend to paraphrase liutenant dan on the midst of the storm.
is that the best you can do? bring it on!
and problems just work themselves out.
OMG YES! I just started rereading The Big Leap for the third time and managed to get past some major ULPs—and had an incredible physical, emotional, and spiritual awakening!
I am on high alert for ULPs in the coming weeks and months.
So glad that you’ve recovered and that things are going so well that you are pressing against your upper limit! xoxo Hilary
Marie,
You just described my life for the past three weeks since I did my version of Laura’s email marketing campaign! I’ve been mentally and emotionally through the sieve of becoming a success, and I know it’s working from the hurricane I’m in.
Lucky for my I didn’t get sick. But the rest of the roller coaster ride is definitely here. I declare this a High Quality Problem to have. Let’s celebrate with everyone on the blog. YAHOO!
.-= Athena´s last blog ..Paying FULL Attention to Kids =-.
Aha, very interesting to read about your experience – I always find myself doing really pointless, needless tasks when I am about to do something really major – like when I was studying recently for my nutrition qualification, I would find myself trying to use my hard-won ‘study days’ as a time to catch up on laundry (doh!), instead of studying. I did manage to fight it enough to actually take my exams and pass (Yipee), but it was sooooo hard to fight my own determination to fail.
Speaking from a health point of view though, when you get ill, and take time to look after yourself (just like you did!), you will grow, flourish, expand and just get better in every way – making you perfectly ready for the challenges you face next.
I am loving reading all about you and wish that I could somehow have signed up for B-school – maybe next time??????????
With amazement from England,
claire
Great post! And this is actually coming at the right time for me! My readership for my examiner page has increased 500% this month alone. I find myself doing crazy self-sabotaging things like missing my self-appointed writing times, losing things, overeating, or just becoming preoccupied with frivilous shit.
This morning I said to myself “What’s up with you????” And I realized that inside, although I am super happy that my readership has increased, I am also unbelievably scared. I am moving out of my comfort zone by leaps and bounds and…wowza…what happens if the bottom falls out from under me??? Knowing that 1) I am not crazy and 2) I’m on the right track puts my mind at ease a little.
Thanks for sharing this.
Shay
Hi Marie,
Great post, indeed! I’m just about to launch my business, am eyeball deep in all the “stuff” involved (ie lots of work and MAJOR freakin excitement) and yesterday had a complete and utter meltdown. My gremlin was going NUTS (and as most of us know, when our gremlin gets uber loud, it’s because we’re on the verge of something bad ass).
And today I read this.
xo,
Andrea
I appreciate myself for taking the time to read this article!
Love it!
Hey Marie,
I just got new courage to move on and dream on/create on and also take a break from time to time 
celebration time*
WOW, I am amazed, how often I got your posts and they just fit perfectly in what is going on here in my life. Thank you for your compassion-and allowing-ourselves-a-truly-good-life-reminder
Big hug and love, Stephanie.
NB. I ll finally give myself sometime to watch Mad Men – yeah
Kate knows!
Marie, I’d never heard of the ULP until now — but by George, I believe you’re on to something! There have been times in my life when I’ve broken out in hives because I was so excited about something. Never knew there was a term for it. Thanks for sharing this about yourself; I’ll be able to put things in better perspective as amazing things happen in the future.
By the way, my hubby and I just discovered Mad Men. We’ve been getting the episodes from Netflix. That is one wild show!
Keep up the pampering and self-care.
I have an ULP problem too, only I get sick *after* the big step across the comfort zone. What’s with that?!
xx
Anita
Marie – this has to be one of your best posts ever — and maybe because it hit me so perfectly today or maybe because I’m going through my own fog and shift right now. Thanks for sharing this honest account of what’s going on with you. I’ve never heard or read this concept explained quite so well. Thank you for that.
I am glad you’re feeling better!
.-= Anne Samoilov´s last blog ..Why Letting Go Can Be The Best Way To Get Exactly What You Want =-.
Well, we’re all in good company then, aren’t we? All of us who have experienced “upper limit” issues. Man, I’ve done a ton of personal development work over the last two years, and I’ve never heard of this concept — but it makes all the sense in the world. And dovetails nicely with some other concepts I’ve been exploring lately. For example, when you are trying to love yourself and believe in yourself and saying affirmations and honoring yourself, and you get just near to the point of falling in love with the fabulous person you know you are, but the subconscious mind/beliefs havn’t quite caught up to the conscious mind and its beliefs, and so the sabotaging stuff starts to happen.
For me, I am not where I want to be just yet, but recently some very good things have happened, and things are definitely continuing to progress in an upward trajectory for me. Yet just the other night, I was standing in the middle of my living room, feeling shaky and teary and emotional — for no apparent reason. I mean, I couldn’t figure out where the hell it was coming from! So I’m thinking it’s the upper limit thing. Holy crap, I really think that’s what it is. : )
So this morning in the shower, I had a serious talk with my subconscious mind and said to it, “Stop effing with me and trying to make me feel anxious and scared and unworthy, I am kicking ass and I rock!” Yes, I know it sounds crazy, but it worked!
Gawd, thanks so much for sharing this whole “upper limits” thing, it gives me a whole new framework for seeing and correcting my own sabatoging behaviors.
Gotta agree with some of the other commenters here — I am SOOOOO glad I found you and your blog!!
.-= Kimberly´s last blog ..“I-Don’t-Really-Drink-Wine” People- This is For YOU =-.
Marie – This is fantastic news…ie. that you are all better and it was nuthin’!!! Not to mention that it is a sign of the next great wave to come…
And let me tell you, if you looked that great and were that radiant walking out of my yoga class with a stomach virus, I can only imagine what it will be like to see you when you are in full effect, sweet One!
Looking forward to that,
Big love,
Amy
Good to hear that you’re feeling more yourself now Marie, how horrible. But what grounded and inspired friends you have – I hadn’t heard of the Upper Limit idea before but it makes so much sense, especially when I look back at my early singing career. There were a number of occasions where the most incredible opportunities were coming my way, but I would end up with a huge cold or a hoarse voice, and I felt like my body was deliberately sabotaging me. Of course I suspected things were psychosomatic but this is a different kind of angle…and of course it will always kick in everytime I reach the limits of every new set point.
But that’s liberating. Totally frees you up to be kind to yourself, doesn’t it?
Instead of berating your body for letting you down, you can thank it for the internal heads up that you have some awesome receiving to do!
Take care Marie and can’t wait to see you in November.
.-= Natalie Peluso´s last blog ..Return On Joy =-.
Hi, Marie,
Thanks so much for this article, it’s really good))
I think I had a ULP when I met my husband and we strted living together. I felt sooo good with him and my life changed so quickly and so radically that I… felt sick all day for a month or so. I didn’t have an idea of what the hell was wrong with me! I visited doctors, I made a pregnancy test… Then in one day it just stopped and I started feeling OK. Now that you wrote about the Upper-Limit Problem I realised, that’s what is was!
It’s very very good to know this, I’ll be calmer the next time I hit my Upper Limit))
Olga
.-= Olga´s last blog ..Тренинг – Как Заканчивать Зависшие Проекты =-.
Okay, don’t hate me (especially cuz I love you so hard), but I’m not buying it.
I’ve definitely found that when I work too hard to have too many things on my plate I get stressed and if I don’t take a time out I get sick the SECOND a project is over. Like, within the hour.
But my body sabotaging me because I’m “doing too well”? Sounds like an excuse to me. Granted, I think everyone’s bodies effects them in different ways and what might effect you might not effect me.
That said, I’m freaking SAD AS SHIT that I won’t be in the States for your event… Big sad face
.-= Marian Schembari´s last blog ..Cyberbullying Sucks =-.
I do believe in the ULP, but I also agree with Ms. Schembari about the getting sick part. I think that’s not a function of things being too good. It’s a function of you working too hard, or stressing too much.
Now, on the other hand, the ULP makes sense when you go look for a fight, or when you’re like, “Yay! I’m the skinniest I’ve ever been! Where’s some cake?” (Well, not you; me.)
Or, with money: I have a habit of setting a lower limit for how much is ok to earn in a year and making sure I don’t go below it, but when it comes to how much I really want to earn, I think “I wish I could make that much,” not really believing it’s possible.
Marian, I’m sad as FUCK that you won’t be here. Top that.
.-= Lbelgray´s last blog ..Chopsticks suck =-.
I hear you ladies and love you both and have too considered that. The big BUT here is that throughout the ENTIRE launch and past few weeks, while I have very been busy, I’ve also gotten into the best physical shape of my life. Yoga/working out 4-5X per week; juicing almost everyday; cut out 90% of crap foods, gotten a lot of sleep (I sleep way better in the Hamptons) and home cooked meals way more than when I’m in the city.
So while I don’t deny stress can and likely did play a part, I was actively participating in my health/well-being waaaay more than usual. Just trying to provide an honest picture!
OK, now we have our answer. You, in the best shape of your life? The Universe wasn’t prepared for anything that spectacular. It struck you down.
.-= Lbelgray´s last blog ..Chopsticks suck =-.
Now I’m just responding to myself to get my gravatar in here. I guess I wasn’t logged in. I hope it works now.
.-= Lbelgray´s last blog ..Chopsticks suck =-.
REALLY helpful – thanks so much Marie. I especially like your point about “it’s gonna happen a lot so strap in and enjoy the ride, baby!” Yes!
Wow, I’m feeling like you wrote this post directly to me. I get sick every freaking time I step up and make my life better. I’ve read The Big Leap and know that it’s an upper limit issue, but still haven’t figured out how to resolve it. Thank you for providing the 3 step plan. I will take that on.
Hey Marie, thanks for sharing this story and idea with us. My absolute favorite blog posts – the ones that are so magnetic and useful – are always personal stories of growth like this. A lesson without a personal example is usually too effing preachy. Your honesty is much appreciated.
I keep coming across articles & concepts from Gay Hendricks but the terminology “ULP” is new to me. I can totally relate, though. In fact, I’m there right now, and it’s very tempting to get into self-blame mode. This was the perfect reminder to get me back on track: focusing on what I do have, loving it, and riding the wave of discomfort through to the finish.
I know I can do it. And I know all you other amazing women going through your ULPs can do it, too. *respect knuckles*
Peace,
Lauren
.-= Lauren Lionheart´s last blog ..What Is Life In the Bonus Round =-.
Hi Marie,
Keep Rockin all the wisdom. I so needed this, I am the master of self sabotage when it comes to my success. I have been experiencing my body shutting down in terms of energy levels, increased stress and motivation over the last month. My body is sayin your workin too much get back in your shell.
I think big, dream big and act on my thoughts. I am going to start focusing on my INCREASING MY UPPER LIMIT POTENTIAL.
Thanks…
Hi Marie,
There is another aspect that I see. ; )
Yet you suggested we leave our thoughts, not our insights, right? ; D
I’ll keep it simple: Can you imagine that it might be part of a transformational shift that your body-being needed in order to release some old stuff that you needed out of your way … in order to embody the new higher vibration you are ready for???
If you have any questions e-mail me, ok? xo
P.S. Last night before I went to bed, I was wondering if it would be ok to tell you this. Then I had a funny dream with you in it … which clearly said Yes!
Great post, Marie. I’m so happy my cuz Rachel and I were right about the Upper Limit Problem. It’s so freeing to be able to name what is going on when life gets really good and then all of a sudden we get sick or have an accident to bring it back down again. This really is all about “how good can you stand it?” And I love that you reminded us here that this is not a one-time thing. The more we expand the more upper limit problems we’ll have…so I’ve begun to celebrate my ULP’s when I get them. It means I’m busting on through my limits. I recently wrote about waking up in a total financial panic and how I discovered some hidden ULP’s having to do with my financial reality…Here’s the article: Cash, Truth + Upper Limit Problems: http://katemoller.com/cash-truth-and-upper-limit-problems/
I reached my own Upper Limit this week after a great preview call. All I wanted to do was start following up and filling my new program. The universe thought lots of naps and comfort food was a much better option. I still got stuff done, I was just tired enough to not be mentally sharp. I realized what was going on on day 2 of staring at the computer zoning out. Now I know that I need to pace myself after a big breakthrough so I don’t end up sabotaging the whole project.
.-= Miriam Ortiz y Pino´s last blog ..Back to School Interview =-.
Thank you so much for this post!!!! You have no idea how MUCH I needed this right now! My biggest “fault/habit” is sabataging myself JUST when it seems/feels like my life/work/dreams are coming together! Now for the 1st time I get it – I’m 55 yrs old and have been so afraid that I will never get the life I want! I see “it” I feel “it” I’ve just never been able to LIVE IT!
Hi Marie,
this post literally blew me away. Everything you described I could relate to and I was actually going through it just as I read the article – it could not have come at a better time! Like any “illness”, once you can identify / label it, it becomes much easier to deal with so rather than feeling defeated, this time I let it ride and pushed through. The whole ULP / self-sabotage thing is a reall issue, especially for women these days, but knowing im not the only one….can’t tell you what a mega relief that is.
Marie you touch so many women in so many ways from all over the globe, you are truly amazing. Keep it up, love from Anne, London
Amazing article Marie because I had a massive nauseousness attack for 4 days last week too! ULP it was – thanks So much for posting this – My ULP cure was relaxing into it and letting myself get used to more – You’re the best Marie, Eleanor
I love this! It completely explains an almost identical experience I had that earlier this year immediately following a yoga workshop — It makes so much sense, and I’m inspired by looking at in this way. I always appreciate when someone can illuminate a situation through humor, thoughtfulness, and good writing. Thanks!
Hi Marie!
Love the article and the insight. I can definitely relate. Mine manifests in oversleeping. It seems liek whenever I am making massive progress all of a sudden I oversleep and find myself having to play catch up.
Any thought?
Mina
Wow. I can relate. I find when I work hard on a project for a week or more, my body tells me to sit my ass down or fall down (dizzy spells). Watching these signs and being in tune w/my body before these hit is so helpful.
I think it’s our body’s way of telling us that we’re running out of juice and it’s time to regenerate.
Marie, this is great! I’ve done some training with Gay and Katie Hendricks, and Gay believes that our only *real* problem is an Upper Limits Problem (or ULP). Currently I’m involved in consciousness training at the Boulder Center for Conscious Living where we learn to recognize when we’re having an ULP. And now when I feel like I’m catching something or my stomach is upset, I wonder first if I’m scared.
I’m glad you’re not sick, just ULP-ing!
This is sooooooooo awesome! I am going through this is we speak and I will be ready for it next time. Sick as a dog for the time being though. But I love it! Success is near…
Marie, you did such a wonderful job of outlining the basic concepts of the upper limit problem, but I can’t help but comment that The Big Leap was extremely poorly written. I find the juxtaposition of this post with the actual content of the book to underline the intuitively ‘correct’ conceptual points in contrast with the anecdotal evidence that made his book difficult to really take to heart. Well, I mean I derived value from the concepts, but I feel someone who understands the concepts and is more logically grounded might be able to better convey Gay’s messages. And I feel like you, Marie, would be an ideal candidate for such an undertaking, provided that you didn’t just create this post in response to it being such a trendy topic among netpreneurs.
Love everything you do!
I’m currently reading The Big Leap now, so feel I’m so SO on the right track and right there with ya sister. I also am seeing ( 20/20 ) how I recently trashed some amazing opportunities in my life cause they were actually Amazing and I was totally uncomfortable with them. Ah…. alas… I’m loving myself through it. And speaking of love, I can feel the love that you have for yourself in your writing. This, beneath the bad ass marketing stuff you’ll teach us, is what strikes me the deepest about your work Marie, the love. I feel it. Thanks! xo Tancie
.-= Tancie´s last blog ..Self Responsibilty =-.
Marie,
I find your wisdom, compassion and enlightenment absolutely amazing at such a young age. I’m wondering if you were born that way? (are you an Indigo?
I love your combination of spirituality and sexiness. I suspect that you have heard of Mama Gena, right? I graduated from her Mastery Program in 2007, or was it 2008?
Anyway, I luv ya sistah and keep up the great work!
Hey Marie,
Its interesting your use of terms “upper limit”.. The idea of sabotaging success is also interesting. My girlfriend once told me when things look bad, “milk it”.
She kind of meant what you wrote in the later part of your article , “It means you’ve just increased your capacity to experience wealth, happiness and love – both for yourself and for us all. “.
I love the way you put that! We call it “breakthrough” to new levels. But the idea of “capacity” is very cool… I’m thinking that you mean that “endurance” creates a space for “wealth” to fit in! Does that make sense?
Well, thanks for this article. ‘preciatcha!
xo Caryn Elizabeth
this book is being pushed into my life. 3rd time im hearing about (each time from a VERY POWERFUL LADY).
thanks for talking about it & sharing, love.
see you May 12.
xxxxo.
m.
Wow, Marie, you are always relevant and amazing. Also, the subject of your e-mail was spot on, if I didn’t know better I’d think you were sneaking a peek at my Kindle.
Wow Marie that was amazing, thank.you!
Hi, Marie. I had a upper limit problem myself several years ago. It is getting better now. Like you say, it is the hurdle that everyone with an aim has to overcome. Anyway, I never told anyone before now that I want to be a writer as a part of being an entrepreneur. But certainly not a erotic fiction writer. I just want to let you know that I am on the stage of pondering the direction I should go with concrete ideas. And, it is not ready to show it to anybody else so far. I will fill up the materials for RHH immediately when I am ready. Thanks.
Thanks, Marie
I believe I am going through it right now.
Everything is so right and awesomely promising, that I can’t breathe well and I wake up in panic: “Something must be wrong!”
So I won’t wonder even for a moment why your post came to me today
Love,
Llyane
I’ve discovered that Bioplasma from Hyland’s allows a dramatic increase in the amount of Energy that your system can allow to flow through.
Also Extra Virgin Organic Coconut Oil is anti-viral, anti-bacterial, anti-parasitic and anti-inflammatory.
Whenever I experience flu-like or cold-like symptoms I find that taking 10-12 tablespoons a day will lead to dramatic improvement.
This is SO what I needed to read today … AGAIN!! I’ve been experiencing a lot of self-sabotage lately, and I think that is MY way of dealing with the success that is coming my way in my new business! I need to just hang on, change my thoughts up to take away that sabotage thing and replace it with respect, love, empowerment, belief and so on!!
Thanks for your amazing posts every week Marie! I’ve really come to anticipate them! Loving it!
Marie, you are such an inspiration girlfriend! Every week I look forward to your thoughts, advice, and wisdom…you’re such a massive help for women like me who are just starting out in their own business. Holla!
Boy do I know what you are talking about! Last Fall when my stars were aligned and I made big things happen/reached big goals I also felt cocky enough to challenge someone I should not have and the shit hit the fan! As I am now trying to get our of a deal (a lease to be precise) I find myself wondering “why the heck did I do that?”.
Although the past is in the past and can’t change how I did things last fall this serves me as a big EGO check. Next time I will meditate and get centered before I take any major decisions!
Hey Marie
Do you know what’s weird? I actually thought I was clicking on another article of yours, but this one came up and it was EXACTLY what I needed to hear.
I’ve been affirming lately “I’m ready for the next step” and all sorts of opportunities have been popping up – some that are scary and I catch myself saying “But, I’m not ready for that!”… It takes me a moment to see the irony and then I gently say to myself “I AM ready for the next step”.
Marie, thanks for the most excellent post. To me, the “upper limit problem” equals fear. I’m so glad you brought attention to this and that you offered tips on how to avoid or solve it.
WOW! You’re the girlfriend that we all need… I love this “Upper Limit” concept. Before reading this article, I totally thought that I was alone in this world sabotaging my successes and I was doomed for a life of failure. Muah! Big kisses to you for empowering and resetting my thought process. I CAN and WANT and WILL ACT on any self-inflicted acts of sabotage. I appreciate your honesty and love oozing out of your website… You help make us women stronger!
Hi Marie and all,
So good to hear you talk about this as it is such an important issue and one that is not often mentioned.
So often I have gone for things and then got stuck just before achieving it, people would say you have a ‘fear of failure’ and I kept saying no, it is actually a fear of SUCCESS that I have – exactly the issue you mention here. They say it is hard for us to go past the success level of parents, I agree but there are many other factors also.
Anyway, great advice about staying aware and watching behaviour at times of ‘breaking through’ old success levels…it is as if we have to watch ourselves from the outside in a way. Thanks again for another timely motivational video!
Regards,
Cheryl
Sydney, Australia
I’m LOVING going through the links you sent when I signed up. Another WOW. Mix with what I have in me so far and stir and….AWESOME!!!!
Here’s my two bits…
When we “jump into the next level of orbit”, or however you want to put it, IF we go with the “physical world as a product of not physical world” model, we have just cleared out a bunch of soul level CRAP, like old beliefs, old points of view, so it MAKES SENSE it might need to clear the physical versions of all that out. Ta-da! A flu, or whatever puts us into a sweat, a liquid diet, a nice clearing out of guck.
I have been known to get headaches. I believe it often is crap clearing out. I decided to give up Advil and start paying attention to what my head was trying to tell me. I focus on on the pain, often get some kind of insight and it dissolves, pretty quick. Sometimes the insight is…just renovating the ole brain, here, so it fits the energy you’re putting through it now, Nic! The “other” headaches come when I have got off track some way, lost heart, got tired out. Maybe my brain is un renovating?! Getting back into my passion groove is the solution then.
Marie,
Whoops. I run a 100 person manuf. company plus just launched a coaching / consulting entrepreneurial co – both of which are going exceedingly well. Yet – I am squirming on the inside & converting energy from adrenaline which is pretty much ripping up my stomach and ruining my sleep. So – right after I apologize to my husband for poor spousal performance in the last week – I am going to embrace your tips for moving through the upper limit. So the irony is… developing awareness of when you are self limiting & exploding through that anabolically is exactly what I coach high potentials to do every day…. And yet, here I am – down the hole and in the cave – blind as a bat to what’s going on. Thanks for the wake up. I’d love to see you post more on this topic.
Thank you for the upper limit post. I cannot believe the timing as I have been banging my head against my own without knowing what to call it with similar symptoms to yours plus a bit of overt agitation towards all those I love.
EXACTLY what i was looking for!
brought tears to my eyes, i have sabotaged so many things because of that, the “pb” is i have never managed to stop my heart from craving for my dreams so i feel always like a lion in a cage wanting what i want and not being able to go for it
I wish i could give you a big kiss on your lovely face Marie! the past is done there is nothing i can do about it but the present is right there and i can stop all this now, thank you so much
another great article! i admire and thank you for inspiring and sharing it with us. your tips are very helpful. i already bookmarked this page so i can read it again from time to time. great job!
Marie,
I use Gay Hendricks work with ALL of my Image Coaching clients. It is SHOCKING how much Upper Limits come into play! I see ULP’s in my life every day. It helps you let go of sooo much self judgement on Why The Hell Did I Just Create THAT?!
I consider “The Big Leap” critical and essential to anyone leaping forward and upward in their lives.
fyi..busy moms/gals/entrepreneurs~it’s an easy read! BUT one you may have to take several paragraphs at a time to chew on. (Great for bathroom breaks!)
Love,
Auretha
Image Coach, Sexy Stylist!
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