Hate Deadlines? Use This Strategy to Set a Realistic Timeline for Your #1 Goal

Hey, it’s Marie and welcome to another episode of The Marie Forleo Podcast and MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life you love so much like I love my purple pants!

Anyway, today’s question comes from Belinda, a student in my Time Genius program who asked:

‍Hey Marie — I’d love your take on deadlines. If there's no actual project deadline, no outside party waiting on me to deliver, except for when I want my project done — how do I set realistic time goals when I want the freedom to take as long as I want, and I don't want the burden of feeling pressured or behind? 

Belinda — this is a fantastic question. First up, it’s important to remember that deadlines exist for a reason, because they really work. 

Lots of psychological research has been done to back this up, to back up the power of deadlines. For example, Dan Ariely did a study several years back where he had three different groups of students. Some were given no deadlines, others created their own deadlines, and the third group had to stick to deadlines set by the professor. 

Guess what happened? At the end of the semester, it turned out that the students with NO deadlines performed the worst and the students with externally imposed deadlines performed the best! So the bottom line is that yes… even though deadlines can be uncomfortable and annoying, they’re a fantastic tool to help us perform better and actually get things done.

But the real answer to your question, Belinda is actually found in a powerful question. And when I ask you this question, you have to pinky-swear, you need to be super honest with yourself about your answer.  

Here’s the question, Belinda: what’s most important to you at this stage and season of your life? Is it to actually get this project done and complete or is it more important for you to experience the freedom and joy of just allowing this project to unfold and take however long it’s gonna take.

There’s no right or wrong answer here — just the one that’s really true to your heart. 

You know, we had dinner recently with Josh’s stepmom, she’s 85 years old, her name is Ida and she is this incredible powerhouse – she’s a world-renowned anthropologist, and among many other things – she’s also the author of several books.

So I was like, "Hey Ida, what have you been up to lately? Have you been doing a lot of traveling? Do you have any new projects going on?" And Ida was like, “Yes, actually… I’m working on a new book.” 

I was like, “Cool — is there any timeline for this project? Where are you at with your publisher?”  And Ida smiled and she said, “Oh Marie – I’ve been working my entire life with having deadlines. I’m so done with that. I just told my publisher that I want this book to be all about the pleasure of the process. Whenever it's done, it's done. I'm just working at my own pace." 

And I gotta say I really respected that answer. I could visibly see the joy and relief in her face when she said, “I’m just working at my own pace.” Because so much of her life, previous to this, was all about meeting all these deadlines.

So for you, Belinda, it’s really about making a choice. You need to have an honest look in your heart and ask yourself, “What is truly most important to me at this stage and season of my life? Is it getting this project done in three months, a year — whatever time frame it is — or is it more important for me to just enjoy the creative process and allow this thing to unfold as it unfolds?”

And then once you’re clear on that, once you decide what’s most important, you need to be at peace with your choice and do not torture yourself with the alternative! 

If you decide that getting this thing done in a particular time frame is really most important, then be smart about it and yes, create a deadline for yourself. It doesn’t have to be a crazy intense deadline or be one that freaks you out — but again, deadlines work. They are proven to help us get things done and perform at our best. And remember, as a Time Genius student, you already know this, but you also have the tools you need to enjoy the process of actually having a deadline! So you have access to literally dozens of science-backed tools and practices that’ll help you hit that deadline with as much freedom and joy as possible.  

Now on the flip side, if the truth in your heart is like, “You know what? Right now — all I want to do is explore this project and I’m gonna work on it with zero attention on when it will get done.” If that’s how you feel Belinda, that’s awesome! Let’s celebrate that! Because that’s a beautiful answer too! And I want you to make sure you give yourself permission to have that experience and enjoy it — without indulging in the toxic emotional pattern that you’re somehow behind. That’s some old, unhelpful conditioning from the world of Time Stress that has no place in your new Time Genius life. 

That was my A to your Q Belinda. I really hope it helps. 

Now, I want to hear from you. What’s the most important project you’re working on right now? And is it a project with a deadline or is it a project that you’re working on just for the pleasure of it?

Let me know in the comments below. And hey - if you enjoyed this episode, make sure you subscribe to my channel right here on Youtube. You can click this button because guess what, it really helps us keep bringing you the inspiration and motivation you need to be your best. And if you’re listening to the audio version, make sure you subscribe to our podcast — because guess what, I don’t want you to miss a thing and we have so much goodness coming up! 

Remember, your experience of time IS under your control. You only get this one precious life and you always get to choose how to live it.

And if you’re thinking to yourself, “Marie, this all sounds pretty great, but I’m so damn overwhelmed I don’t even know where to start?” I can help you with that. My Time Genius program is open right now but only for a few more days. And I promise you, if you spend 5 days with me, I’ll help you learn how to skyrocket your productivity, and your joy, and your freedom. You can learn more at jointimegenius.com/join. Best of all, Time Genius comes with a money-back guarantee so you literally have nothing to lose but overwhelm and stress and everything to gain!

Until next time, stay on your game and keep going for your big dreams because the world really does need that very special gift that only you have! Thank you so much for tuning in, and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV and The Marie Forleo Podcast.

54% of folks who make a resolution fail to keep it up past six months! And then guess what? Most people make the same damn resolutions ten times without success. That’s sad, isn’t it?